Welcome, fellow Ham-and-Eggers, to today’s blog on How to Diagnose and Fix 5 Common Toilet Problems.  I know you are in a surly mood when your best buddy, The Commode, is on the fritz, so I’ll dispense with my normal babbling and get right to work.

Malfunction #1- Here’s the scenario: one minute you are sleeping peacefully dreaming of possums, then the toilet starts making a racket out of nowhere, filling up the tank for no reason.

How to Fixed a Clogged Toilet

Bienvenidos muchachos.

Those 3 extra-spicy burritos you devoured last night seemed a good idea at the time, but now Montezuma’s Revenge is wreaking havoc with your stomach and you must pay your penance on the vitreous china throne.  The problem is that while you and your foggy head were in bed recovering from the after-effects of the grande-sized pitcher of margaritas used to wash down those burritos, your 5-year old son decided it would be a fun game to toss his rubber ducky in the toilet and push the flush handle.  Unfortunately, he hasn’t been trained in how to unclog a backed up toilet.

Today’s blog is on how to repair a constantly running toilet.

Let me tell you a short story first. Now, I’ve got a cousin Jasper who is powerfully afraid of both toilets and possums.  One evening, he had gone out possum hunting and ran into a big alpha possum who wasn’t overly amused at being hunted.  The possum sprang at him and sank its teeth into Jasper’s hands.  Possum have sharp daggers for teeth.  When the possum was done with him, Jaspers hands looked like raw fajita meat.  Problem was that he had promised Aunt Geraldine he’d fix the toilet.  If you knew Aunt Geraldine, you’d know she ain’t one to be put off.